Living a Childless Life: Acceptance Pt. 2
Acceptance means you are present with what has happened and the reality of your situation. You are willing to face the reality of living a childless life and all that it means. It means you are learning to exist with your grief. You don't have to like it, but you are ready to take your seat in the reality of it.
If you haven't read Part 1 yet, I suggest you do, as the following will make way more sense with some context. Read part 1 of Living a Childless life: Acceptance here.
What does it mean to face the reality of living a childless life?
Does it mean you must accept you will be sad forever?
Does it mean you must accept being treated as less than because you aren't a mother?
Does it mean you must accept not having holidays off work so your colleagues can spend that time with their children?
Does it mean you must accept sleeping on the couch so your sister's child can have the bedroom?
Does it mean you must accept being treated like you have all the spare time in the world and can be available last minute to care for others?
Does it mean you must accept others' assumptions that you have nothing meaningful or insightful to add to the conversation because you aren't a mother?
The short answer is NO.
These are not things that you have to accept.
Practicing acceptance doesn't make you a doormat without needs, wants or valuable insight.
To accept the reality of childlessness is to build a relationship with grief, actively re-establish confidence, create meaningful friendships, reimagine your future and take steps toward that future.
And just as the path of grief is non-linear, the way of acceptance is the same.
It is not a static state you reach, and all is good. It takes intentional practice and action.
With acceptance comes confidence, discernment and choice.
With your newfound confidence and discernment, you can choose to speak up and create boundaries around scenarios such as those I listed above. You can decide to take steps towards happiness in your reimagined future.
It all starts with the practice of acceptance, with taking your seat in the reality of what is.
