Creating Childless Holiday Traditions
Being childless often means feeling left out of the usual holiday traditions. This year I am determined to create my traditions and reclaim the holidays.
Spending time with people who matter to me during the holidays is important. And I don't always get to do so. Some of these people aren't part of my family, so it isn't a given that I will see them over the holidays. This year, as part of my mission to reclaim the holidays, I have made a point of getting together with good friends. Some are childless, some are not. I started this plan-making early; otherwise, I know it wouldn't have happened.
A dear childless friend, who I haven't seen in a year and a half because we don't live on the same island, covid and her incredibly packed schedule, and I went on a getaway relatively close to home this past weekend. The fullness of her life makes it quite challenging to make plans, so I proposed this getaway at the beginning of November. Finally, we found a weekend in December that worked for us, and I booked the accommodation.
We met up this past Friday night in a dark, rainy parking lot, she loaded up my car with her stuff, and we set off on our West Coast adventure. We travelled to a small community on Vancouver Island called Shirley, settled into our weekend accommodation and unpacked so much food!
Eating good food is our shared delight, so we naturally brought way more than we could eat. That night, I made dinner while we talked and talked and talked. The depth of conversation and the equally shared speaking and listening time were more nourishing than the delicious food.
We spent the rest of the weekend hiking, talking, saunaing and eating.
Having uninterrupted 1:1 time with my friend was so special. We didn't do anything Christmassy, but the weekend had a celebratory feeling. It fulfilled what I was looking for:
Loving connection,
Equal airtime - meaning one person's life or situation doesn't dominate the conversation,
Time to slow down,
Adventure - hiking a section of the muddy Juan De Fuca trail in the rain down to Mystic Beach during the king tide was wild! Driving through a blizzard on the way home....equally wild!!!
Creation of a new childless holiday tradition.
We both agreed to take the time for this holiday getaway next year—a time to connect and slow down before the inevitable chaos that the last half of December brings.
What plans are you making towards reclaiming the holidays?
What new traditions are you looking to establish?
